After the loss of a loved one, the holidays can be especially difficult and painful.

1. Decide what can be handled comfortably and let these needs be known to family, friends, and relatives:
    whether or not to talk about your loved one openly
    whether you can handle the responsibility of the family dinner, holiday parties, etc., or if you wish someone else to take over some of these tasks
    whether you will stay here for the holidays, or choose to “run away” to a totally different environment this year.
2. Do not be afraid to make changes:
    open presents Christmas Eve instead of Christmas morning or vice versa
    have dinner at a different time
    let the others take over decorating the tree, making cookies, etc.
3. Do something for others:
    giving a gift in memory of your loved one
    adopting a needy family for the holidays
    inviting a guest to share your traditions

The holidays are a joyous time for most, but for those who have experienced a loss, the usually festive time of year can be a painful reminder that their loved one is no longer around.

ExpectCare would like to share this poem with those of you who have lost a loved one in hopes that it will provide some comfort for you during this holiday season.

I see the countless Christmas Trees around the world below, with tiny
lights, like heaven’s stars, reflecting on the snow.
The sight is so spectacular; please wipe away that tear, for I am
spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.
I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear, but the
sounds of music can’t compare with the Christmas choir up here.

I have no words to tell you, the joy their voices bring, for it is beyond
description, to hear the angels sing.
I know how much you miss me. I see the pain inside your heart, but I
am not so far away.
We really aren’t apart. So be happy for me dear ones.
You know I hold you dear, and be glad I’m spending Christmas, with
Jesus Christ this year.
I send you each a special gift, from my heavenly home above.
I send you each a memory of, my undying love.
After all “Love” is the gift, more precious than pure gold.
It was always most important in the stories Jesus told.
Please love and keep each other, as my Father said to do, for I can’t
count the blessing or love he has for each of you.
So, have a Merry Christmas and wipe away that tear.
Remember, I’m spending Christmas, with Jesus Christ this year.
– Author unknown